Living outside the US, I’d like to lead off with one, big, fat wake-up call to commercial software companies: the rest of the world doesn’t give a weak hoot about what goes down in the US state of Texas. The last time people in other countries paid attention to a drama in Texas was when we were all trying to figure out who shot J.R. Ewing.

But this is Linux news, and so we have to pay a little attention. After months - or is it years? - of threats from Microsoft’s Steve Ballmer about wanting to sue Linux for patent violations, somebody finally put their money where their mouth is. But not Microsoft directly - oh, no! that would be too manly! Instead, they hired some renegades from the ranch to get up a posse to smoke Linux out.

Linux, meet IP Innovation LLC, purveyors of the next big lawsuit against Linux. They’re going after Red Hat and Novell for violating a patent they hold, which is on… computers! No, just kidding, it’s on “User interface with multiple workspaces for sharing display system objects.” OK, now think of a single computer you’ve ever seen which doesn’t have system objects, display them, use multiple workspaces to display them, and does so in a user interface context.

By this definition, every computer ever invented, as well as cell phones and satellite TV, violates this patent. Since a “workspace” can be a desktop, window, a web page, or even a command line, and everything that uses an icon or even a pull-down menu is a “system object”, this covers every machine invented since the Xerox Alto. Which is funny I should mention, since ZDNet points out that the patent originally belonged to Xerox in 1991. So, sixteen years later, this company which previously used the same patent to extort money from Apple, now goes after Linux.

Why not against Microsoft? Gee, could it be because, as Groklaw points out, IP Innovation LLC is a subsidiary of Acacia, and Acacia has seen a sudden influx of ex-Microsoft executives? Well, yes, maybe that might do it.

Now for a kicker - what does IP Innovation LLC do? Do they sell anything? Do they produce a product? Does anybody out there own a product made by them? Well, that must be why their home page makes no mention of offering any product except litigation: “At IP Innovations, our staff of research professionals can help you ensure that your creative property is protected and free of potential conflicts from unanticipated sources of copyright or trademark dispute.”

Oh, yeah, this was so unanticipated. I had more suspense over who shot J.R.

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