Reasons why I havnt blogged

Posted by: Rea Maor In: Blog Updates - Saturday, April 26th, 2008

Top Reasons I Haven’t Updated This Blog in Six Months

1) I’ve been breathlessly watching to see how the MicroHoo soap opera plays out.

Will Microsoft buy Yahoo? Will Yahoo partner with Google? Will Yahoo sell Flickr? Will Microsoft buy Digg? Will Digg sleep with Yahoo to get back at Microsoft while Microsoft blackmails Google and Google confesses that it’s really the father of Flickr? The suspense is keeping me paralyzed.

2) It was dark.

I was afraid that I’d get eaten by a grue. Especially since more Infocom games have now been discovered.

3) I’m still sulking since Digg left me.

After all, Digg is a manic-depressive girlfriend. Everybody remembers their first turn with Digg. She came, she loved, then she disappeared. Then she came back. Then she told her kids to just start calling me “dad”. Then she ran away and filed a restraining order. Then she showed up on my doorstep in the rain at 2AM demanding beer. And so on. On the plus side, I get to raid her purse for cool pharmaceuticals after she passes out on the floor.

4) I’ve started my own religion.

Hey, if Davezilla can become a Lukumi priest, I figure I’ve got a shot. Except my religion won’t require me to wear white for a year. Instead, it will require me to dress like a scary clown for a year. In addition, it will have as its central deity the Swimming Macaroni Monster (because the Flying Spaghetti Monster was taken). And instead of converting people, I’ll just convert money. I will also establish the rule that beer is evil and so we have to get rid of it by drinking it all as fast as we can.

5) I’m still deciding who to vote for in the United States presidential election.

Yes, of course, I’m not a citizen of the U.S., but as easy as Diebold voting machines are to hack, what’s to stop me? We “Middle East” countries have at least as much concern as any U.S. citizen has about their president. Probably more. I bet I know more about American politics than this guy.

6) I’ve been waiting for Flickr to load.

I’ve always wanted to just send Flickr a stamped, self-addressed envelope with a note: “Just stick some pictures in here and mail it back to me. It’s faster that waiting for your website to load!” However, they’ve apparently managed to make enough money to splurge on a new server.

7) I’m still waiting for Google to settle down!

Have you noticed that Google has quit being predictable any more at all? If they aren’t pillaging everybody’s page rank, they’re radically altering search results. Just this month, I’ve noticed that it now includes non-quoted hits even when you use quotes. Try it. As unpredictable as they’ve been, I’ll see nothing come in one week and hits for completely unrelated terms the next.

But at least I had an excuse. These are good excuses, aren’t they?

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One Response to “Reasons why I havnt blogged”

  1. Binny V A Says:

    Lol – thats a great description of Digg, btw.

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