Twitter’s Tweeters and the Twagic Twits They Tweet

Posted by: Rea Maor In: Social Networks - Wednesday, May 20th, 2009

Oh, no! Not again! Yes, again! The tech world is all hot in the pants for some new buzzword! It goes around and around the blog world. They can’t stop talking about it. they fall asleep blogging it. From the people who brought you the AJAX hype machine and the Second Life viral marketing campaign, meet Twitter!

Let me make it clear for the one leper colony member who has been locked in a basement for the past two years and thus has not heard the news: What is Twitter? It’s IRC. On mobile. Yeah, that’s it.

Oh, OK, let’s back up a little. It’s not IRC. If IRC lost all but one of its servers, had its scripting and commands taken away, was confined to 140 characters, couldn’t share files, and had no moderation, then Twitter would be IRC. The sole innovation is that it runs on mobile devices. One IRC client Perl script ported to the Blackberry and Twitter would be gone faster than the first funk train out of Jivetown.

That’s why everybody’s making fun of Twitter now. That’s why 60% of new users in the US quite after one month. That’s why things like the swine flu get reported on it.

Also things like “who farted?” and “I have to pee.” You do? Good for you! Do we have to change your nappy or can you make it to the potty all by yourself like a good girl? Seriously, search Google for “” and “I have to pee” in quotes. 4,080 people have announced that their bladder is full on Twitter. No more dignity than a Sim. Don’t even ask about Number Two.

Clearly, this is indispensable technology, so it will be a shame to see it go away in a few months when people realize “Hey, this is just another plain old text message system!” Let’s take a moment to remember and pay tribute to the staggering hype that was Twitter, before it passes into the shadows.

And to flory10, who’s so unclear on the concept that she keeps posting her home page link over and over again.

And to meeshmeesh, who posted one disgusting update.

And to the GetAFreelancer job poster who needs 1000 female profiles (with PICS!) delivered in batch.

And… oh, what’s the use? This is too easy! I’m bored again.

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